Is there anything more depressing than really looking at the state of the Kickstarter campaigns you’ve contributed to?

Look at all that red. Ugh!

Some stuff has gotten closed out but certainly not enough and barely any of it on time.  I mean, the results of Swords & Wizardy are great, but dang: they showed up five months late? Zpocalypse turned up a full six months late.

I’ve got high confidence about some stuff: W20 (very surprised to realize it’s several months late), the sundry LotFP campaigns will be worth the wait and will show up eventually. They keep posting stuff to 1650, though Sigmar only knows when I’ll have it in my hands.

Other stuff I’m less confident about: I fully expect the Jorno portable folding keyboard is vaporware at this point, and that Scott Starrett has ripped a bunch of people off. I’ve been pissy about Tectonic Crafts for a while. In fact, mid-post, I realized that we’re fast approaching a full year since the campaign funded without any sign of shipping… so I requested a refund. (I requested a refund for the Jorno as well, but it sounds like people are actually getting them from ArchyDan while Starrett has gone as quiet as Maliszewski but without the tragic context.)

It’s shocking that I still go anywhere near Kickstarter: I threw in for Hell Dorado (which I honestly have low expectations for, given that the only thing I can think of when it comes to Cipher and Hell Dorado is how badly they screwed up in bringing it over), and I’m eyeballing Sails of Glory (which is something I might play with my father, once).

Is it unfair that I really, desperately need Reaper to ship my Bones this week? I very, very much want them to break the cycle. They’re shipping stuff now. If it doesn’t get here this week, it’ll probably be less than a month late. For crowdfunding, “less than a month late” is exemplary punctuality… but man, I want a green row to break up all that red.

Double-Vampire – v. The act of going way overboard on something that you had no idea you even needed/wanted a few days ago. 

I shouldn’t have to mention the Reaper Kickstarter by this point.  You should know about it and should have already contributed to it.  It’s really bypassed Ludicrous Speed at this point.

When Reaper announced that the option to take a pass on the Sophie model in exchange for a $25 credit… things got even more nuts.  What was 210 models (at the time of this writing) at $.47/model became 209 models at $.35/model.

That’s when people started talking about double-vampiring, because doubling down on a bullshit insane ridiculously good deal seems pretty reasonable.

I ran the numbers.  I’d already planned on ordering extras of a few sets included in the Vampire set: the Townsfolk sets, Dungeon Dressing, and Swamp Things.  Rolling their costs and shaving off the Sophie and an add-on or two that I like but don’t love puts a second Vampire level effectively at paid for.

I slept on it.  This morning, I decided I’m not going to double-vampire.

It really is a stupid good deal, and you really should 1) throw in on this thing and 2) double-vampire.

What’s keeping me from doing it?  I’ll enumerate the reasons:

1650 IndieGoGo

• Pro Starter Packs x2 (4 minis each)
• Terrain (5 minis)
• Extramuros 05
• Vecino
• Gentilhombre
• Volatinero
• Bust of the Guard

Dreamforge Games Kickstarter

• Leviathan Crusader x1

Mantic Kickstarter

• Orcs
  • Krudger on Gore
  • Orc Flagger
  • Ax Orcs x60
  • Greatax Orcs x20
  • Morax Orcs x10
  • Boar Riders x20
• Goblins
  • Goblin Archers x80
  • Goblin Warriors x60
  • Goblin Spearmen x40
  • Goblin War-Trombones x3
  • Goblin Mawbeast Pack x10
  • Goblin Sneek
  • Goblin and Mawbeast
  • Fleabag Riders x10
  • Snotling Mincer x2
  • Snotlings x3
• Werewolves x6

Reaper Kickstarter

• Vampire x1 (209 minis)
• Mind Your Manors (3 minis)
• Demons (2 minis)
• Deathsleet
• Pathfinder Red Dragon
• Clockwork Dragon
• Frost Wyrm
• Deep Dwellers (5 minis)
• Nethyrmaul
• Hydra
• Extra Townsfolk (5 minis)
• Extra Townsfolk II (4 minis)
• Extra Dungeon Dressing (5 minis)
• Extra Swamp Things (4 minis)

Red Box Games Kickstarter

• Watch Captain Whistlelock
• Robert of Carlisle
• Aenglish Watch x4
• Dire Wolves x3

Sedition Wars Kickstarter

• Biohazard (99 minis)
• Terrain Pack (4 minis)
• Dr Susan Ridley
• Ramirez
• Engineer Niven Banks
• Hexen Phaedrus
• Calamity Crew x12
• Baby AI Drones x18
• THI Carapvace

So, at the time of this post (it will likely change: Reaper has a frankly terrifying velocity, and 1650 has 5 days to raise another ~$700), that’s 737 minis that Kickstarter and IndieGoGo has coming my way.

In a word: Fuck.

That’s a dangerous amount. If I double-vampired, it’d be scraping close to 1,000.  I don’t how good a deal it is: crowdfunding already has me reaching beyond my grasp with projects.

(I plan on referring to this page every time I’m tempted to up a pledge.  Those Eisenkern Stormtroopers might look amazing, for example, but 737.  STAY STRONG.)

Kickstarter / IndieGoGo’s really been kicking my ass over the past few months.  Could potential creators, like, take a few months off please?

Anyway, by now you should all know about the Reaper Bones Kickstarter, which has become such an insanely good deal it’s ridiculous.  There are so many freaking minis involved in this thing, it’s kind of all you can do is start laughing maniacally, eyes rolling back into your skull, while you try to figure out where you’re going to put all of them.

That said, I’m much more excited about the 1650 IGG:

It’ll be a skirmish game.  There will be rules.  Maybe they’ll be good: I don’t know.  With minis like this, though, I don’t care.

Dammit, more minis need musket rests!

I need these minis.  They’ll (probably) see use in my Empire army.  They’ll get pushed around in the context of the 1650 game.  They (might) see use in an English Civil War force.  They’ll definitely see table-time in an RPG context.

Get these minis to me.  Get these minis to you.  Buy into this thing, per favore.  It’s got 2 weeks left and only needs another $3,325 to go.  That’s totally doable!

As an aside, Tercio Creativo did totally set up their stretch goals all wrong.  (Not in a bad way for you, potential backer.)  When you need $8K to be successful and receive funding, there’s no point to having stretch goals that add additional minis at $4K, $6K, and $8K.  Contributors will get them if funding is successful, or funding won’t be successful and they won’t.  There’s no stretchiness to it, you know?